As i grow older (fatter and shorter!), I constantly find myself stopping at junctions whose roads lead to different paths of life... Questions after questions flood this throbbing delirium state of mind... not to mention my capricious tendencies... Some of the whims: I'm feeling stagnant. Should I do I... Q1. Cease all businesses? Q2. Apply for scholarships to do my Masters overseas? Q3. Become a full-time Art Director in a big agency? Q4. Convert to a full-time Media Artist (respek to LilPinkDevil on his brave and daring move) and live on funding? Q5. Get married and have babies? Then I'm faced with the following dilemma: A1. Still in the midst of settling FORK's separation with ex-partner. And I'm still getting invites for pitches and confirmed projects, so I don't know where to begin to end everything. A2. It's damn bloody hard to scrape govt's money for scholarships, i tell you. If you can get away with bloody bursary, count yourself lucky. A3. Lots more questions: Am I good enough? Is my portfolio sufficient? Have I got substantial experience and references to make it? A4. Quite a good option as I'd have to starve and then I'd lose weight. But looking at the turtle-slow growth of the Media Arts industry in Singapore, what's the point of even thinking about it? A5. Probably the easiest way out. But I'm still in an emotional whirlpool as I was 3 years ago. I guess not then. So, where does that leave me? Back to the same old shit again.